03-Vengence On Varos-CLIP 014

The most flattering picture in existence of the Sixth Doctor.


Quadraphonic Sixie.

Porn Colin

The Sixth Doctor's Intro.


A rousing speech.

Time For Colin

It's always Colin time.

Six intensifies

[Six intensifies]


Colin Baker: Ace Attorney objects to this wiki.

Who a shit

Colin knows best.

While other Doctors were Time Lords, the Sixth Doctor was truly the Pie Lord.

Background Edit

He was played from 1984 - 1986 by former porn star and part-time chef Culinary Bakehouse until Seven deliberately killed him.

First appeared at the end of Caves, his first full story being the smash hit The Twin Dilemma.

Story Edit

The Sixth Doctor was fucking terrible and was the second Doctor to be played by a porn star after Peter Crushing. Sixie was so fucking autistic that he wore a cat pin to remove himself from the continuity of Doctor Who. Cosplayers who insist upon recreating his costume are widely (get it? because he's fat?) considered to be the worst.

Most of this is a direct result of not defying the standards, but rather the exact opposite: Misguided nostalgia.

In spite of the rising quality of his episodes, people were getting a bit tired of Peter Davison by then because all they wanted was to see what William Hartnell, Patrick Troughton, and Tom Baker were like (and as luck would have it for the fans, Davison wanted to leave by then anyway, because his hero suggested it). Because all they had to refer to their personalities at the time were the sometimes inaccurate Target novelization depictions, they assumed that a Doctor like them combined would be like the Sixth Doctor. Back then, just going with the Target novelizations, everybody assumed that the First Doctor was nothing but authoritative and grumpy, the Second Doctor was nothing but alien and silly, and the Fourth Doctor was nothing but bohemian and arrogant, in spite of the vast amounts of depth all three characters had, and that these descriptions even partially contradict what they were actually like. This is probably why, strangely, the Sixth Doctor didn't face a lot of criticism for being in violent stories or being an arse until The Two Doctors. They all just kind of assumed that this was what the Doctor was supposed to be, until they got sick of it, which still happened very quickly, just not nearly as quickly as you might think.

Why JNT thought that a combined flanderization of inaccurate depictions of the First, Second, and Fourth Doctors would wear a psychotic clown coat remains a mystery, but it probably has to do with all that coke he was snorting.

His onscreen tenure was complete fucking trash but he was later redeemed by Briggs Finish. Some say Vengeance on Varos is a classic. Trial isn't all bad either. I'd also give The Mark of the Rani a whirl. Actually, when it gets right down to it, the Sixth Doctor's stories were generally still better than those of Season 24 and about a quater of NuWho. He just gets a lot of hate because the show kinda forgot what it was about during his time, not to mention that he opened with strangling Peri, who is not only a lady but was also arguably one of the best 80s companions. Nobody would complain if he choked or even flat-out killed Adric, Nyssa, Tegan, or Mel.

Colin and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat Edit

If it wasn't for that goddamn coat Sixie might be remembered more fondly. The coat is a bit of an icon in its own right these days (god knows it's certainly recognisable) but back in the 80's, the meme-costume combined with the increasingly-shitty writing made Sixie seem like some kind of asshole clown.

Not even Osgood would wear it.

JNT's idea was to make the costume "totally tasteless". It's certainly a brave move, but it doesn't really help the show's popularity when your main character looks like a complete twat.

Regeneration Edit

Sixie eventually overdosed on pies (citation needed) and regenerated into the Seventh Doctor (citation needed). Colin didn't film the regeneration because by that time he could no longer fit through the TARDIS doors. He was last seen in The Ultimate Pie.

Colin didn't show up for Time and the Rani (who can blame him) but returned for Dimensions in Time and The Five(ish) Doctors.

Alternate Ending Edit

There's a VNA that reveals Seven actually murdered Six because he was fed up with Sixie's bullshit and wanted to take over. Six then goes on to become the Valeyard. Bad luck Handy...

Death laughed, and raised a soft finger between the Doctor's eyes. "Don't lie to me! You sacrificed the colourful jester because you needed to be born! Time would have her champion and he was just the compost for your blooming. You ran your TARDIS into the Rani's beam joyfully. Hah! Your sixth self hates you for that, he will become Valeyard for that..." (from Love and War)

Companions Edit

Memorable Quotes Edit

"What's the use of a good quotation if you can't change it?" ~ Sixie never knew of wikis.

"Pies. Glorious glorious pies."

"Ta-da! One of my best, you will love it! Many say it's a classic. Bought, of course, to replace the one that strangely went missing. Great news, though. This one has extra features! EVEN MORE OF ME." - Varos time.

"You're wasting your time. I've locked all the doors." - Colin's family face doom in The Five(ish) Doctors.

"You were expecting someone else?" ~ Sixie is allowed everywhere.

"You'll forgive me if I don't join you." ~OH SNAP EPIC BURN *airhorns*

"I hate everyone."

"As easy as pie? As easy as pie?!" ~Six gets aroused. Peri is kill.

"I've eaten possum's anus on live television."

"Planets come and go. Stars perish. Matter disperses, coalesces, forms into other patterns, other worlds. Nothing can be eternal." ~Sixie was clearly Nine's favorite Doctor.

"In all my travelling throughout the universe, I have battled against evil, against power-mad conspirators. I should have stayed here. The oldest civilisation: decadent, degenerate, and rotten to the core. Power-mad conspirators, Daleks, Sontarans, Cybermen - they're still in the nursery compared to us. Ten million years of absolute power! That's what it takes to be really corrupt!" ~Sixie shortly before dropping the mic.

"Only two things in this life are certain - death, and pies."

Gallery Edit

The Doctor
First DoctorSecond DoctorThird DoctorFourth DoctorFifth DoctorSixth DoctorSeventh DoctorEighth DoctorWar DoctorNinth DoctorTenth DoctorEleventh DoctorTwelfth DoctorThirteenth Doctor

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