Colin Baker received billing over Peter Davison in Davison's last story. So really it's the greatest SIXTH Doctor story of all time.


The Doctor, invited to participate in a BDSM 3-way by Sharaz Jek, with his companion Perpugilliam. Most of the following scene was removed from the final version because the best broadcasting company said so.

Red pill

Some guy being forced to take the red pill.


What most fans remember of this episode. Higher resolution not available. Deal with it.

The Caves of Andro-zany! is the sixth serial of the 21st Season of Doctor What. It starred Peter Davison as the Most-Based Doctor and Nicola Bryant as Ameribait.

Background Edit

It was the last TV story to feature Fivey and is absolutely the GOATest most epic and perfect story created for any medium ever and you can't argue otherwise or Merryfat will erase you from existence.

The Caves of Andro-zamboni was the last time the Fifth Doctor would be seen on television until the canon Dimensions in Time in 1993 and the slightly less canon Time Crash in 2007.

This episode also introduced Colin Baker as the first No One Loves Me Outside of Audios Doctor.

Additionally, /who/ rated The Caves of Andro-Rani their favourite story ever in /who/ Ranks Who 2015, so you have to like it.


Didn't I tell you how based this episode is? Watch it you fucking pleb, or I swear to me mum I'll clob ya in the gabber.

Basically Fivey runs around a bunch of corridors as in every episode before this one with him in it. This time though he's not doing it to save the world. He just wants to save Peri. Seriously, everyone fucking dies in this episode (even the silly armadillo monster and the bad guy who thinks he's on House Of Cards) except her, making her the first most important companion.

This of course begs the question of why the TARDIS, if the non-canon episode The Doctor's Wife is to be believed, brought them to Androzani Minor. Fivey does jack all except get himself killed and everyone on Androzani Minor was going to die either way. The only plausible explanation is that the TARDIS decided it was time for Five to regenerate and choke the life out of Peri, likely due to the TARDIS having sadistic fetishes for Peri.

Continuity Edit

This is a comfy, GOAT episode and thus it is central to the canon of Doctor Whatsit.

The antidote to the spectrox poisoning was “milk from the queen bat,” so that means that the Doctor totally squeezed a bat tit.  This makes him the first being depicted on the programme getting to at least second base with another species, until Capt. Jack came (ha ha) along.

Also we finally get an explanation as to why Fivey put a stick of celery on his lapel. That's cool I guess.

The Fifth Doctor heads to the planet Androzani Minor; in the most cannon and least coherent Christmas special of all time, the Eleventh Doctor fends off a heard of Androzani tree harvesters- whether there's any relationship to the planets of the same name will never be explained.

Production Edit

Written by the omniscient Robert Holmes. Like most of Holmes' stories, he got the idea off of an internet Doctor Who rage comic [citation not required].

May he rest in peace and may Jamie Mathieson, future showruiner of Doctor Who, digest his soul to become top GOAT.

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